Desi Grills – 12 Months In Review! 4 Magic Moments


Wow, 12 months have now passed since we did our first Desi Grill/Desi Pub review and nearly 70 pubs later we are still dining out in various locations trying to ensure we do not wake up with a burning ring (sometimes we have managed it, but mostly not)

Ok in celebration of 12 months of excess eating we thought we would share some events with you that have amused us during the last year, never did we think it would get so personal lol.

Via Email

Venue: You lot are f****** liars, the day the review went out, the place was closed, so how did you review it?
Us: The review does not go out on the same day as we have visited, but we visited on **/**/** at 6pm, please check your cameras and you will see two of us dining alone in the venue.
Venue: Our food is fresh, and the venue was clean, come down when I am here big man, and then we will see what is shit.
Us: We understand you are not happy with the review, but we can remove it from the list if it is upsetting you.
Venue: Basta**ds

What can you do, we removed the venue, and thankfully we were not beat up

Cocaine Den

Well, some of you will know the name of the venue as we have shared with some friends, but, OMG! This place was like a re-enactment of an episode of Narcos!

Firstly, we walked into the venue and looked around and the atmosphere was very very joyful, we went to the bar to order some drinks, and the bar man told us “Just a second, I’ve just got to nip to the toilet” no worries we thought, nature calls. 5 minutes later he returns, but this time I think he left his jaw in the toilet as he was a mess.

We got our drinks and took a seat, and once we observed what was going on, damn everyone was “off their tits”

The toilets seemed to be the busiest place in the venue and the gear seemed bang on as peoples jaws were all over the place, bags were being passed freely and we had to just leave, especially when we saw the chef take something from the bar man! This was an experience and half.

the gear seemed bang on as peoples jaws were all over the place 

The Whats App Group Kick Off!

So we had reviewed one desi pub in a certain location and it got a great review, we then, a few days later posted the review of another pub just down the road, and the owner lost his marbles, yet they had not got a bad review at all, just not as good as his mates!

Via a friend in a what’s app group: “tell those t**ts they can f**k off, we never served that food for ages so how can they do the review, lying b**tards”

Us: via that friend in another what’s App group “Bro, tell him we went 5 weeks ago, we even spoke with bar man who knew one of the guys we went with”

Via a friend in what’s app group: he said “your website is shit, and if you ever go again, he will make sure you are banned”

The next few hours on what’s app went like this with death threats and even at one point the pub owner saying he would get the whole of his “manner” to shove a shish kebab up my arse so I could review that!

Then as all what’s app group beefs go, someone posted some porn and the conversation turned back to that, and yes we never paid that pub a second visit even though we did recommend it to a few.

he would get the whole of his “manner” to shove a shish kebab up my arse so I could review that!

The Bribe

Well it started off as a general chit chat over the phone with a friend who I had not spoke to for a while, general pleasantries were exchanged and things were going fine, until we had been and reviewed his friends venue.

We went to visit the venue he had told us about, which belonged to a close friend of his, as soon as we got through the door, we knew he had told the owner we were coming, we were treated like royalty, the food was OK, and we reflected that in the review, it was a decent venue but nothing special.

We were then rang up by an irate pub owner, calling us cheats and corrupt! Why?

The former friend, who had recommended a certain venue, had been paid £200 for a good review and to be number one in the league!

The first we heard about this was when were being challenged about it on the phone. Our credibility was at stake and we were up for a brawl!

Mans Not Fit, But Mans Can Brawl

We had to ask this irate pub owner to call over the guy who said he paid us, and we would bring along our friend who took the payment! Well it was quite amusing as the pub owner who paid £200 for a good review hid, but he could hear the conversation.

We went and asked our then friend what had happened with the whole situation.

Ex-Friend “Look bro, his idiot always showing his money off, so when he said he wanted a review I said I could sort”
Us “Did you ask him for £200”
Ex Friend “Safe, yeah man, his an idiot though, too much money and he loves to show off, and I think his daughter fancies me man”

BOOOOM – The hiding pub owner comes running out and we have a full brawl in the bar, man this was too funny!
The friend is now an ex-friend, not sure what happened with the £200 but wow, this was a true highlight!


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